I'M SO EXCITED AND I JUST CAN'T HIDE IT!

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Now this is what you are supposed to be feeling when you are engaged.  I am finally not stressed anymore and I truly believe I fully understand what it means to marry Nate.  It is not about the big, fancy, "perfect" wedding day... it is about the marriage; Nate and I starting a family of our own.  The other day Nate and I went to Lagoon together and while eating some corn on the cob I asked him we could start our own traditions and carry them out every year.  He agreed that was a great idea and mentioned how great of a father he was going to be to our Cambria (yes we already named our first born, ha ha) and how much he had to offer her.  It was the most amazing thing I have ever heard from him; well besides that he loved and wanted to spend his life with me of course.  Hearingg Nate say such beautiful words made me understand the kind of love a father SHOULD have for his daughter.  Heck Nate has not even met her and there is already such a large area of Nate's heart saved for his baby girl :)  That melts my heart knowing that I am going to give birth to a little girl that is going to be loved so undearly by her father.... she is going to be daddy's little girl for sure.  And as much as this excites me I also cannot help but feel a sharp pain in my own heart because of the love my own father has for me.  Honestly, the man values money so much that he does not see the big picture.  Ever since I got engaged I have been waiting patiently for my dad to come around to becoming a father.  It was not until Tuesday night that I realized that waiting on him is like waiting on the chances of winning the lottery (not good).  He has blown me off countless times, built my dreams up only to break them far too many times.  He even had the guts to say to Nate and I that he did not feel comfortable helping contribute to our wedding because when we call off the wedding he would be out that money.... WTF, what father says that?!?!.  I have had enough and writing him off has been the best thing ever!  From this day forth I am not wasting my time on people who do not matter.

Today my mother, who happens to be my best friend, and I went off to do wedding preperations.  When our minds get rolling insync incredible things are created.  My mom has taught me how to take an ordinary item and turn it into the most spectacular pieces.  My darling second mother, aka De De, also helped us brainstorm some fun unique ideas.  I am SO grateful for these two women in my life and truly owe who I am today to them.  God may have given me a turd bucket as a father, but man he made up for everywhere else in my life.  I consider myself to be the luckiest girl in the world!  My fiancee' is the most incredible man I have ever layed my eyes on and in only 2 months I will be his wife for eternity!!!  Some items for the table center pieces.... stay tuned, we are just getting started. 






PS I get to pick up my completed invitation tomorrow with insert cards!!!!!  They are the most adorable things EVER!  Thanks so much for the countless hours Chris and Crystal Ross spent on creating such a beautiful piece for us.  Ahhh.... I cannot wait to see it all done!